I love you
by vballxox
Summary: Sara's gone, and Gil's learning to deal. With some twists and turns, Gil learns that saying goodbye isn't forever. GSR, read and review: p.s. I dont own the CSI team or anything like that, although my birthday's coming up:
1. Chapter 1

Gone

_Gone.. Gone.. Gone.__  
__This word was going around my head like a ferris wheel going round and round. This can't be. Sara can not be really gone. Or can she. No no no, Sara. MY Sara. __  
__I can not take this anymore._

Gil Grissom picks himself out of his chair, grabs his coat and starts heading out of his office. The lump in his throat is growing bigger by the second. _"No. Not here. Not in the office. Not in front of everyone."_ He heads to the locker room to pick up his things. On the way out, Catherine calls after him, "Gil, I'm heading to an important scene now, want to come along with me?". Grissom walks right by, not even glancing up, or thinking of looking back.  
He gets to his car, and closes the door. He is limp. He can not move. He can feel the lump in his throat rising again, but this time there is no backing down. He is trying to control the sobs that are coming from himself.

_Why is this happening to me? I love her so much. How am I supposed to go on living without her? Where is she?_

He puts his car into gear and drives out of the parking garage. He doesn't take his usual route. He's not quite ready to head home just yet. He tries to turn on the radio to get his mind off of Sara, but he knows it is no use. He keeps driving. He's not even paying attention to where he is going. The car starts to slow down, and he knows where he is. He climbs out, and heads to the booth to buy a ticket, and he waits for the next ride to come.  
He still cannot believe what is happening. The roller coaster has arrived and he seems to be one of the only people getting on alone. He climbs into his usual seat, straps himself in, and waits for the ride to start. Only this time, Gil doesn't get the normal thrill he usually does when he rides the rollercoaster. instead, it was as if he was seeing everything in slow motion.  
Once it was stopped, he got off and looked around him. All the people were in pairs. They were laughing together having a great time.

He shrugged.

Grissom started heading back to his car. It was not even like he was in his body. Like his soul has left, and all that was left was him. Him. Alone.  
Once he reached his SUV, he climbed in, and started heading to the place he was dreading the most - **home.**  
He stuck the key into the lock, and heard the usual click.  
He opened the door, closed it behind him and bolted it shut. He did not reach for the lightswitch to turn on the lights, he just stood there.  
He tried fighting the sobs, but he could tell that they were once again, going to win.  
Gil made his way to the sofa, but in the middle of the room, he just dropped. He curled up in a ball and started crying.

Then, everything went blank.


	2. Chapter 2

Gil Grissom finally woke up

Gil Grissom finally woke up. He looked around, and he noticed that he was sleeping in his bed.

_What is going on here? How did I get here? What time is it. ohhh, no. NO NO NO._

He curled back into a ball and pulled the covers all the way over him. He never wanted to get up. He just wanted to stay there forever. Or until Sara returned to him. Her side of the bed seemed very empty to Gil. He wanted to reach over to her, and hold her. He could not though, and that made him shudder. Gil popped his head out from under the covers and checked the time. 7:30 PM.

_Wow, I've been sleeping a while now._

He pulled himself out of the bed. He glanced at the photo on the wall. Him and Sara. They were both smiling. Happy to be together.  
He pulled himself away from it, and headed to the bathroom. He turned the water on in the shower and hopped in. The warm water felt good on his body. It soothed him, and the aches and pains in his muscles seemed to be unknotting themselves. He spent what seemed an eternity in the shower, and then turned the water off. He grabbed his towel and stepped out.  
He wiped away the steam on the mirror, and took one long look at himself in the mirror. Dark, permanent circles were under his eyes. You could see the laugh lines that formed over the years, but also the worry ones. He sighed and stepped back.

After getting dressed, he longed to just crawl back into bed and stay there. But, he knew otherwise. The gang was probably wondering where he was since he missed work today, and probably were getting worried. Knowing Catherine, they probably had a search party up and going for him. He headed down to the kitche where he planned to make some supper. Here and there on the walls were picture of him and Sara.

_Oh Sara. What's happening. Where are you? I love you so much._

Once arrived in the kitchen, Gil opened the cupboards and searched for something to eat. He wasn't even hungry so he just decided to skip out on supper. As he looked around the empty kitchen, all the walls started spinning. He steadied himself on the counter, and sat down. Gil took long deep breaths and that seemed to calm him down. He grabbed some tylenol from the counter and gulped them down with some water.

He was setting his glass of water down on the counter when he suddenly heard the front door opening and closing. "Grissom, is that you?"


	3. Chapter 3

"Hello, is there anyone home

"Hello, is there anyone home?" the voice asked again. "Sara... SARA, IS THAT YOU?". "No Gil, its me Catherine, where are you? Oh there you are", she said as she walked through the kitchen door. "How are you this evening? It's good to see that you're feeling better. I have to admit, I came around here last night. You didn't show up for work and weren't answering your phone." She hesitated, but continued, "I used your spare key that you kept under the mat. I know you said to only use it for emergencies, but I really didn't know where you were." She glanced around the room, looking at all the pictures that were hanging on the walls of Sara and Grissom. Gil sighed. He knew there was no more secrets about their relationship. After Sara had gotten kidnapped a few months ago, he pretty much told the whole team that he was in love with her.

"I found you laying in the middle of the room. I hope it's ok that I dropped by. I tried helping you get up from the floor, but I couldn't myself, so I phoned up Warrick. We got you off the floor and in your bed."  
Grissom turned his back to her and picked up his jacket and car keys. "I'm actually just heading to the office now. I really appreciate you coming by, but it is really nothing. I must have just caught a little flu bug". He couldn't look at her in the eye. There was a long pause, but Catherine broke the silence, "Are you ok?" she whispered.

_I am NOT going to lose it in front of Catherine. Hold yourself together Gil. What is your problem?_

He kept his gaze on the floor for what seemed forever, and looked up. Catherines face was twisted in confusion and worry. He blinked back tears, and managed to croak, "Yeah, I'm fine. I really should be going to the office now though." He put his jacket on and stood still in front of Catherine like he was waiting for something. "Oh, um , Alright then, thats good. Let me know if you need to talk though." she replied. They both turned towards the door, and exited the house. He locked the door on the way out and climbed into his car. "See you at the office", Catherine called.

As Grissom was driving to the office, he was replaying the conversation with Catherine over and over again. When he finally arrived at the building, he walked straight for his office. He shut the door behind him, and sat in his chair. Not long after he sat down, he heard a knock on the door. "Yes?", Gil asked. The door creaked open and Nick walked in. "Um, Sir may I have a word?". He sat down on the chair facing the desk. "I know you probably don't want to talk about this right now, but I just want to let you know that we are all missing her right now. We know that you love her, and miss her, but if you need any time off, just let us know." They sat in silence, until Gil responded, "Thanks Nick, I really appreciate it." "You know shes like a sister to me, so if i hear anything, I will tell you immediately." He got up, and walked out, shutting the door behind him.

Grissom looked at all the paperwork on his desk. All right, time to pass out the tasks. He grabbed some papers, got up and marched to the break room. The whole team was there waiting for him. Once he entered the room, everyone got silent.

"Ok, listen up, I'm staying in the office tonight since I have a lot of paperwork to do. Catherine you are taking a homicide with Warrick, and Nick, you and Greg are going to go down town to process a scene." They all stared back at him, and Catherine replied, "Let's get on with the show."

Gil exited the room, and when he was walking by the reception desk, the lady called out to him, "Mr. Grissom sir, you have just received a letter in the mail." He almost ran to the desk. "Thank you very much." he said. He returned to his office, holding his breath the whole way.

He closed the door, sat in his chair and stared at the letter that was addressed to 'Gil Grissom'.


	4. Chapter 4

Gils heartbeat began to race as he stared at the envelope

Gils heartbeat began to race as he stared at the envelope. There was no return address.

_Could this really be from her? It feels like its been forever since I've seen her. Please, please._

He flipped the envelople in his hands a few times, and stopped. He reached to rip the envelope when his phone rang. He picked up the phone, without taking his eyes off the envelope. "Hello, Gil here.", he said as he answered his phone. "GIL, WE NEED YOU AT THIS SCENE NOW.". It was Catherine. "Ok, I'll be right there." He hung up his phone, and carefully placed the envelope inside his jacket pocket. He left the office and headed for the scene. When he arrived at the scene, Catherine came running over to him. "Gil, listen I'm really sorry about that, it turns out it was just a false alarm. Sorry for making you come all the way out here,". Gil took a deep breath, and said,"Don't worry about it. But Catherine, I'm going to head home now... Not feeling that great. I'll talk to you tomorrow, Call if you need anything". And with that, he turned around and headed for his car.

As Grissom was driving home, the envelope in his pocket seemed to weigh a hundred pounds. He wanted to open it immediately. Once he arrived in the driveway, he shut the car off, but didn't get out. He reached in his pocket and pulled out the crinkly envelope. He turned it round and round in his hands, until he ripped it off. Inside, there was a piece of white, folded paper. He took a deep breath and unfolded it. Nothing. He turned it on the other side. Still nothing. There was absolutely nothing written on the paper.

His hands started shaking. He crumpled the paper in a ball, and threw it at the window. Gil stepped out of the car and stomped into the house. He didn't even bother changing out of his clothes. He shut off all the lights, and crawled into bed.

_Will she ever come back? What about me, what about her... what about_**_ US._**

Gil Grissom waited for days for another letter, another SOMETHING to prove to him that she was coming back. Those days turned into weeks, and weeks into months. He didn't care about anything anymore. He was working all the time, and barely sleeping. He was never hungry and always felt weak.

_It's been over three months. Are you ever coming back?_

While Gil was working one night in his office, Brass came walking in. "Gil, its time you go home." Gil barely looked up and replied, "No Jim, I'm busy at the moment. I've had so much paperwork to do, I can't just leave now." He waited for an answer, but he didn't get one. Time seemed to go on forever, until Grissom finally looked up at Jim. Jim was staring at him with big, sad eyes. They stared at each other until Jim said, "We haven't heard from her in months. I know how much you love her, but you can't keep on living like this Gil." That hit him hard. He tried calming himself down but he couldn't. "Fine. I'll leave. Is that what you want? I'M LEAVING NOW!". He grabbed his stuff, and walked out of the room. "Gil, wait!", he heard Brass call, but he just walked faster, almost into a jog. He arrived at his car, and got in. Started it right away, and swerved off. He didn't care. He drove home slowly.

_Did I overreact back there with Jim? I'm not acting any differently than I usually do am I? Why is everyone treating me differently. Just because Sara is gone doesn't mean that my life is ending..._

Gil was so lost in thoughts that he didn't even notice the lights that were on inside his house when he pulled into the drive.


	5. Chapter 5

Gil climbed out of the SUV, and locked it up

Gil climbed out of the SUV, and locked it up. He was climbing the stairs to the house, when he noticed all the living room lights were on.

_Thats funny. I swear I never turned them on this morning._

He approached the door quietly, trying to look inside the window. He didn't see anything unusual, but he was scared. There was a big pit at the bottom of his stomach that was telling him something was going to go very very wrong. He took the key out and placed it in the door. click. He turned the knob as quietly as possible. He opened the door, and there sat a man holding a gun pointing toward the door. "Gil, I hope you dont mind, but I used your spare key that you keep under the mat." He smirked. Before stepping completely inside the house, Gil reached for his cellphone, and pressed the emergency button on the side. "Are you going to come it from the cold?", the stranger asked again. He was an older man, late forties. Gil stepped in, and closed the door behind him. He just stood there. "What do you want from me." he asked the man. The stranger chuckled. "Sit down NOW." he ordered. Grissom did as he was told, and sat down in the nearest chair. "Now listen to me very closely Gil Grissom. Have you been wondering where your girlfriend has been for the past five months?". Something cringed inside Gils body.

_I AM GOING TO KILL YOU WITH MY TWO BARE HANDS IF YOU TOUCHED SARA. NO NO NO. THIS ISN"T HAPPENING. _he thought.

He calmed himself and said, "If you mean one of my CSI's, then yes, I have been wondering where she has been." The man let out another laugh, and turned toward the tv. He took the remote and flicked it on. In the middle of the screen, there sat Sara. Tape over her mouth, with her wrists and ankles tied. "Yep, quite a tough girlfriend you have there. She was always picking up a fight at any opportunity. Mind you, she's pretty weak now to be doing any of that.". He continued, "She's been on a very strict diet you see, bread and water, every meal, every day, for the past months."

Grissom wanted to get up from his chair and kill him right there, but he knew that he couldn't do that. He couldn't show any emotions either, or then he knew that the man would be happier, knowing that he was in pain. Gil kept looking straight ahead. The man started talking again, "You aren't a very chatty one, are you Gil Grissom. Now, like I said, listen closely. Sara Sidle is strapped onto this chair, which is hooked up to a bomb. Yes, a bomb. You have three days to hand over two and a half million dollars to me in cash, or your pretty little girl will be dead." Grissom was fighting for air. "Do you understand me?" After Gil didn't answer, the man stood up and shouted, "DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME GIL GRISSOM. TWO AND A HALF MILLION OR YOUR CSI IS DEAD." Gil looked up at the man, looked straight in his eye, and said, "Yes, I'll get you the money. Just leave me alone." The man chuckled. "I'll leave you now, but under one condition. You do not, in ANY way, include any of your CSI friends into this situation. This is between me and you, and me and you only. If I find out that there is other people trying to find me, then I will kill Sara Sidle right away." He started inching toward the door, as if he was going to leave.

"Thank you for your time Gil, and I will be waiting for you call. I put my number on the table in the kitchen for you. In the mean time, have fun watching your girlfriend suffer on your own television." He reached the door, and thats when they heard it.

Police sirens.

"OH SH!T YOU DIDN"T". All of a sudden, the door swings open, and an officer is holding up a gun. "DROP YOUR WEAPON, AND DON"T MOVE." Too late, the man positioned himself behind Gil, and placed the gun to Gil's temple. Gil could feel the man shaking, but he kept a firm grip on him. "Sir, I'm going to have to ask again. Release the hostage and drop your weapon." The man didn't say anything, but didn't realease Gil either. "Sir, this is the last..."

BAM

Another shot went off.

"HE'S GETTING AWAY. GO AFTER HIM!! HE'S ESCAPING FROM THE BACK DOOR, CALL FOR BACKUP IMMEDIATELY."

Another voice was shouting, "GET PARAMEDICS IN HERE RIGHT AWAY."

"Let me through this door right now", a female voice was screaming. "Ma'am, step back, we can not let you in at the moment.", the officer replied. "I'M A CSI GOSH DAMM!T". Catherine busted through the officer and rushed in.

"Gil, Gil, can you hear me? GIL!"


	6. Chapter 6

Wow these lights are blinding

_Wow these lights are blinding. What is that beeping sound. Wait a second, where am I? What happened?_

It took Gil a couple of seconds to realize what was going on. "Nooooooo.", he moaned. He shot his eyes open and saw worried, looking Catherine sitting in the chair. "Gil, are you ok? Last night, a man shot for you, but it just skinned you. You lost a lot of blood." "Catherine,I am fine, but listen to me closely. We have less than two days to find Sara. She is strapped to a bomb, and if we don't give this man two and a half million dollars, she will be blown up." He cringed when he said this.

_Sara honey, we're going to find you. Everything is going to be ok._

But he wasn't sure if everything was really going to be ok. "Gil, what are you talking about?" He sighed. And his arm hurt. "We don't have much time. He hooked up some sort of live feed to my television pointing at Sara. Someone should be studying this, getting information, making sure she is ok". Catherine stood up, and inched closer to the bed. "Gil, your house is now a crime scene. We have been watching the TV ever since last night. Not much is happening, but she isn't getting fed." She continued, "Gil,she's not looking too goo..."

"Gil Grissom, I'm Doctor Sweet. Your arm seems to be healing well, and you are free to leave at any time. Just keep switching the bandages every day. Do you have any more questions?" "No Sir, thank you." The doctor walked out of the room, leaving Catherine and Grissom alone once again. "I'll leave you to get changed. Meet me in the hallway". Catherine scurried out of the room.

After getting dressed and collecting his belongings, Grissom checked out of the hospital with Catherine at his side. "Can we go back to my house, there's something farmiliar about that room that Sara was in that I need to see." They arrived at his house, that was blocked off by crime tape. They walked in the house and saw Nick and Warrick sitting on the couch watching the television set. "Hey guys," Nick said. Gil nodded and sat down beside him. There she was, still beautiful as ever. She looked so tiny, breakable almost. He wanted to reach out and touch her. Hold her. Kiss her.

He looked around the rest of the room that she was in. Something about that room struck him funny. He saw it before, but in a way, it was a strange room. It was almost midnight,and he was exhausted. His eyelids were getting heavy, but he was fighting the urge to fall asleep. He didn't win, and quickly drifted into a deep sleep.

Dreamingg.

I dont remember leaving the house unlocked. I stepped into the house and smelled the scent of freshly cooked cookies. Hello? I said silently. Nobody answered. I took off my jacket and layed it over the chair. Hello, I said a little louder this time. "In here honey!" the voice yelled. I moved closer toward the kitchen and peeked my head in. There she was. Standing there in her pink fuzzy pajamas and blue slippers. "You're home early tonight, " she said as she swiftly kissed him. She moved away, but he pulled her in. "Oh Gil, what are you doing? Getting all romancy on me tonight are we?" She giggled, and flashed a smile. "I never want to let you go" I responded, and that was the truth. We stood there for a long time. Her cheek resting against my chest, and my chin resting on her head. I looked down at her and lifted her chin with my finger. We locked eyes, and our lips met. I knotted my fingers in her hair, pulling her closer to me. She suddenly pulled away, and said, "Gil, I've got to go.". "No Sara, don't leave me. No!". I already knew it was too late when I was standing in the kitchen alone.

Gil woke up in a sweat. He was in an odd position on the couch. Warrick and Nick were on the floor still staring at the TV. "Good Morning sleepy head," Nick said. "Hey, um, how's she doing? Anything new?"

When he heard that still no action was going on, he decided that he was going to go take a quick shower. As he was pouring the shampoo into his hand, he stopped dead in his tracks.

_I know where Sara is._


	7. Chapter 7

OHMYGOSH

_OHMYGOSH. No, this can't be._

Gil shuts off the running water from the shower and jumps out. He reaches for his towel and gets dressed as fast as he can. He runs down the stairs, and by the time he's down, he's out of breath. "I know where... Sara is", he said. "Gil, calm down," Catherine said as she stood up. "NO. LISTEN TO ME. SHE IS IN THE BASEMENT OF OUR FAVORITE DINER. WE GO THERE FOR BREAKFAST ALL THE TIME. ITS CALLED SUNNY SUNSHINE. SHE IS DOWN THERE I KNOW IT. WE HAVE TO GO NOW BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE".

Nick and Warrick rushed out the door. "Lets go then! Drive with me", Catherine responded.

As they were driving there, Catherine said, "Look Gil, I don't want to jump to conclusions, but she didn't look too good on the tv." Gil shuddered, but managed to say, "Let's just get there."

The drive took only about 5 minutes. They were the first ones to arrive. Gil jumped out of the car and rushed to the door. He already had a plan in his head. He knew the owners very well and was going to tell the, the situation, and ask to get down to the basement. When he went to pull open the door, it was locked. He tried the other one, but it was locked too. "SH!T, TELL ME THIS ISN"T HAPPENING", he screamed. Catherine rushed over."Gil, the sign." she pointed to a sign that was hanging on the window. "Due to Christmas Holidays, we will be closed from the 22-28 of December". Grissom didn't even realize that tomorrow was Christmas Eve. He has been so preoccupied for the past five months of just thinking of Sara that he never knew what the date was anymore. They stood there in silence. "I don't care, we're going to have to break in. They will understand once we tell them." He picks up a big rock thats nearby. "One, two, three."

crash

Glass is flying everywheres. And even better, a huge alarm going off. Gil and Catherine rush inside the building, and run to the basement door. The man must've known that they would be coming here, because he bolted the door completely shut. "Dam. This guy had us good, I'll be the one wanting to speak to him when we get back to the lab", said Catherine. She picked up her cellphone, "Yeah, we're gonna need a saw brought in here immediately".

They only had so much time left. They waited for backup to arrive. When it finally did, they broke down the door. It led to very steep stairs going down to a dark, musty basement. "SARA, SARA, HONEY WE'RE COMING". Gil kept screaming for her as he knew they must be getting closer. Without their flashlights, it would be too dark to see. They kept walking, scanning every corner. "How big is this basement for gosh sakes," Catherine mumbled. "SARA, CAN YOU HEAR US?". They kept screaming and screaming.

_Shes got to be down here somewheres. Please._

That's when it hit him straight in the face. There she was. Sitting there limp and lifeless as can be. He ran over to her and cupped her face in his hands. The tape was beginning to come off over her mouth, and he gently started to remove it. She winced a few times, but that's all the reactions he got. "Sara, Sara, can you hear me? Honey, it's me Gil. Are you ok?" He kept repeating that over and over again. They got the paramedics in and they started assessing her. They lifted her on a stretcher, and Gil never left her side. "We're going to need to airlift her to the hospital immediately", one of the paramedics said. "I'm coming", Grissom said, still staring at Sara's face. "Sorry Mr. Grissom, but we're not able to do that." He looked up, and looked straight in his eye and replied, "I don't know if you understood what I said, but I'm coming." He held her hand and never let go. They got her in the helicopter and started soaring through the air.

All of a sudden, one of the paramedics starting screaming, "GET THE A.E.D. IN HERE. WE'RE LOOSING HER".


	8. Chapter 8

No Sara, come on honey, you can make it through this

_No Sara, come on honey, you can make it through this._

The helicopter was just landing at the hospital, and the paramedics were giving compressions to Sara's chest. They rushed her inside, and told Gil to wait in the waiting room. He couldn't sit still. Gil kept pacing the hall back and forth. About an hour later, Catherine, Jim, Warrick, and Nick arrived. Grissom gave them the update, but he didn't know much. A doctor walked out of the room with a clipboard. "Mr. Grissom, may I please talk with you". As Grissom walked over, he felt himself getting weaker and weaker, but held himself together.

_Please be good news, Please please please._

"Hi, my name is Doctor Thompson. Sara Sidle was taken into the operating room. She hasn't eaten or drank in a long time now. She's got a lot of bruising and cuts too. We're moving her into the intensive care unit, just so she can be under constant watch. I can assure you that she is going to be ok." Gil sighed with relief, and fought the urge to cry. He gulped and asked, "Can I see her?" The doctor looked hesitant at first but replied, "Of course. She needs to get a lot of rest though. She is in room 213 on the third floor." "Thank you so so much," Gil replied.

He turned around and walked back to the group. They were all waiting to see what was going on. "She's going to be ok." He said to everyone. They were all so happy. "I'm going to go see her now, I will be back in a few minutes," he told everyone. He turned to walk away, but Catherine caught him. "Merry Christmas Gil. Take as long as you need. We will be waiting here for you when you're done". He smiled, and headed to the elevator.

_Christmas. Wow, this is the best Christmas gift anyone could ever asl for!  
Room ..209…210…211…212…213._

He opened the door as quietly as he could. Finally, there she was. Five months have gone by, but she still looked like the same beautiful Sara as always. He approached her side of the bed. He pulled the chair over and sat down. Gil took Sara's fragile hand and placed it in his. It was surprisingly warm. "Sara honey, you made it! You're safe. Everything is going to be ok now. You're safe". He couldn't fight it any longer, and broke down into sobs. Tears were spilling over his cheeks. His shirt was damp from his tears. Sara's eyelids started fluttering open.

"Gil..Gil..is..that..you?", she croaked. "Yes honey, its me. I love you"


	9. Chapter 9

A single tear slowly fell down her cheek

A single tear slowly fell down her cheek. "Gil, I'm so sorry... I never should have left you. This is all my fault". He held her close "shhhhhh, its alright." They stayed like that for a while. He wrapped his arms around her. Her head was resting on his chest. She could feel his heart beating. That's the last thing that she remembered.

Gil gently moved Sara back down. She looked so peaceful. He decided he would let her sleep.  
He thought about going to let the others know how she was doing.

_But what if she wakes up and I'm not here... That's it, I'll leave her a note._

He picked up a scrap piece of paper and jotted down. 'Gone to update the team. Be back soon. Love Gil'. He was satisfied. He placed it near her hand, and moved for the door. He glanced back at her. Oh how it was good to have her back.  
He walked down the hall to the waiting room, and saw the team sitting around and reading magazines. When they saw him approaching, they all looked at him and stood up.  
"She is doing very well," he said. Catherine sighed with relief. Actually,  
they all did. They all love Sara so much, and wouldn't know what to do without her. "Well, I better head back to the lab now," said Warrick. Him and Nick headed out the door. That left Gil and Catherine. Jim was in the cafeteria.  
"Gil, I'm so happy that nothing has happened to Sara. I know you love her very much, and these past few months for you have been a living he!!."

"Thanks Cath, I really appreciate it." She gave him a warming hug and patted him on the back.

"You better get back to her. It's Christmas you know, well at three in the morning, but still Christmas."  
She smiled. "I better get home to Lindsay soon too. Shes going to be waking up."  
Gil nodded and replied, "Take wahtever time you need. You deserve to have a good Christmas spent with your daughter."  
She turned around and walked toward the door. She stopped in the doorway, turned around and said, "Gil, Merry Christmas," and walked out.

Gil stopped in the cafeteria to talk to Jim for a while and grab a cup of coffee. He decided to return to Sara to see if she had woken up yet.

_She must be so tired. She needs her sleep, but Im not going to leave her._

He walked to her room, and when he arrived at her door, he gently pushed it open.

_Oh my, this is harder than I thought. I must be breaking out into a sweat. Ok here I go.  
_  
He walked into the room and sat down on the chair facing Sara. She was still peacefully sleeping. He sat there, reviewing of what he was going to say when she woke up. He practiced it for so long, not even knowing if it was ever going to happen.  
He was lost in thought when Sara started stirring. She opened her eyes and smiled her Sara smile. She yawned and said, "How long have I been sleeping for?".  
"A few hours, nothing big," Gil replied gently sitting next to her on the hospital bed. He was fidgetting and pulling at his clothes.  
"You look awfully scared," she said jokingly. He stared in her eyes. "Well ACTUALLY," he replied.  
He stood up, and looked at her. He got on one knee, and reached into his pocket.

"Sara, I loved you the moment that I saw you. The brainy woman who always asked plenty of questions in my class, even though you already knew the answer.  
I love the way you tilt your head when you're in deep thought, and the way that you fall into my arms after a long day. These last few months have been very tough on me, and I have come to realize that I can't live without you. Its like trying to find a shadow in the dark, or a single tear in the ocean. And now I want to know, Sara, will you marry me?"


	10. Chapter 10

A tear rolled down her cheek

A tear rolled down her cheek

"Of course I will Gil," she whispered.

He pulled her into a warm embrace. Once they let go, Gil took her hand and placed the ring on her finger.

"It's so beautiful," Sara said.

"Really? You like it?, I'm happy. It was my mothers, I hope its not too out of style for you," He chuckled.

"Of course not Gil. It's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen!". She couldn't stop looking at it. She moved her hand in various positions.

"You're the most beautiful thing I've ever seen," Gil mumbled underneath his breath.

"Aw, you're so sweet to me, you know that?". She smiled.

They stared at each other for a really long time. Gil was so happy to have her back. Just to have her by his side.

"I love you, Gil," she said.

"I love you too Sara." He bent over and their lips met. He knew he had to be gentle with her because she wasn't in a very good condition. He sat back down, and held her hand in his.

He tilted his head back in the chair and closed his eyes. "mmmm,"

"Gil, you look so tired,"

"yes, well I have barely slept these last couple of months. I couldn't sleep in our bed, because it reminded me so much of you, and when I reached over and your side of the bed was empty, I almost lost it. So, I pulled a lot of doubles, slept at the office a lot. I rarely went home, except to feed Hank of course. He misses you so much, infact, now that I think about it, I haven't been treating him all that well." Gil frowned. Sara squeezed his hand,

"I'm so sorry, I never should have left. If I never left, then that guy never would have been able to kidnap me, then this would have never even happened".

"hushh, dont say sorry now, It's not your fault." He smiled at her.

Sara closed her eyes and yawned. Her breathing became even, and Gil could tell she was fast asleep. He smiled.

_Oh how lucky I am to finally have her back._

Thats the last thing he remembered too, before dozing off.

Sara began stirring, and opened her eyes. Gil still had his hand in hers, and she smiled. He was sitting on the recliner fast asleep. He looked so content. She noticed the dark blue circles around his eyes.

_Has he been sleeping at all?_

She continued to study him. Now that she thinks about it, she notices how much weight he lost. His face looks paler. Sara realizes just how much pain he went through without having her beside him. She sighed. Her stomach growled, and she glanced at the clock hanging on the wall.

"6:03 am, wow its early."

She is aching all over. She feels so helpless, like she cant do anything. Sara looks back over at Gil. He was mumbling something underneath his breath, but she couldn't make out what he was saying. She starts giggling.

"Sara..."

He said her name. She smiles. He moves around for a few minutes.

"Good morning sunshine, " he said with his eyes still closed.

Sara laughed, "Good morning Gil".

He opened his eyes, and was looking at the most beautiful person on earth. He couldn't stop but smile. :)

"How are you feeling this morning," he asked Sara.

"Actually, I don't want to sound like a complainer, but I hurt all over. And, I'm SUPER hungry." She smiled.

"Well in that case," he said getting up, "I better go grab you something from the cafeteria since hospital food is gross." He laughed.

He started walking out of the room, and she yelled after him.  
"Do you know what date it is today?" She had a huge grin on her face.

"Merry Christmas love," He said, and he returned to her side.

- - - - - - - - - - - -- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

After two weeks of taking off work, Gil and Sara were finally heading home. Sara was able to leave the hospital, but to be watched closely.

"I cant believe I'm actually leaving this place," She said, as Grissom was helping her into the car.

"Me neither, it feels like I've been living here forever. Hank is going to be so happy to see us both. Im sure Greg has kept a good eye on him".

They drive home, talking the whole way. Sara has already covered most of the story to Gil, and she still shudders everytime she thinks of that man.

Once they arrive home, Sara reaches for the door handle.

"No, just wait here for a second." Gil says with a smile on his face.

He unloads the trunk with their belongings, and bring them into the house. He returns to the car and opens Sara's door. Grissom reaches in and gently picks Sara up.

"Gilbert Grissom, what on earth are you doing?" she says laughing.  
She wraps her arms around his neck, and they walk to the door. Once inside, Gil says,

"Welcome home honey," and he shuts the door.


	11. Chapter 11

**EPILOGUE. I hope you guys all enjoyed reading the story. I had a lot of fun writing it, since it was my first. Thanks for all the reviews and great comments:) I hope to start up another story soon.  
**

Its been a little over six months, and Sara was getting ready for her own wedding. "I can't believe its actually my wedding," she kept saying over and over again. Sara couldn't wipe the smile off of her face the morning.  
She hadn't seen Gil because it's unlucky to see the groom before the wedding. She asked Catherine if she would be her maid of honor, and she greatly accepted. She got a few other staff from the office to be her bridesmaids. Grissom asked the three men, Greg, Warrick and Nick, to be his best men. Jim was going to walk down the aisle with Sara.

Sara and Catherine were in the back room of the church getting ready. Sara walked out of the back room with her dress on. It was Catherines first time seeing in.  
"Oh my gosh Sar, That looks amazing on you!", She was in awe. Catherine started sniffing, and then laughed, "You know weddings, they always get to me." They both laughed and hugged. Sara was trying not to cry because she didn't want to ruin her makeup. She was dabbing her eyes when she threw the kleenex down. "Oh screw it, I dont care if I mess up my makeup." Both girls started laughing all over again.

Once they regained their emotions, Sara stood in front of the mirror. "I cant believe this is actually my wedding day!" she exclaimed. Catherine smiled and said, "I can, you and Gil were always perfect for each other." Sara smiled:)  
Catherine helped Sara put on her veil, and then they both stared in the mirror.  
After a few moments of silence Catherine said, "Wow, you look just utterly amazing." Sara replied, "Catherine, so do you."  
Catherine rushed over to the table and grabbed the camera. She started snapping photos of Sara and herself. She took some in the mirror, some were some wild poses, others were crazy. All of them were to be cherished forever.

They were laughing at one of the pictures that they took when there was a knock on the door. Catherine went to open it, and there stood Jim in his tux. "Almost ready hun, we've got five minutes." Sara glanced at the clock, "Ok, wow, I'll be out in a few." He nodded and backed away.

Catherine closed the door behind him and sighed. "Catherine, I want to thank you. Thank you for everything."Sara said. She continued. "These last few months have been a challenge for me, and you have been right there with me 100 of the time. I think we have really grown close, and I dont know what I would do without you." She smiled.  
Catherine walked towards her and pulled her into a hug. "Sara, thank YOU." They both smiled, and then Sara said, "Well this is it!"

Catherine went down the aisle first, followed by her bridesmaids. When it was her turn, Sara turned to Jim and whispered. "Jim, Thanks. I love you". He smiled and said in her ear,"I love you too hun. I'll always be here for you no matter what. Now don't you forget that." They smiled.

This was a whole new beginning for Sara, and for Gil also. They were opening a new life, and new doors. When Sara started walking down the aisle, Grissom couldn't stop smiling. He looked so beautiful. Her brown hair was lightly curled and layed on her shoulders. Nick whispered up at Gil and said, "Wow Gris, Sara looks amazing." "Uh huh, I know Nicky," He replied.

Sara looked up, and stared ahead. The person she was looking at was the person she would spend the rest of her life with. Sara and Gil locked eyes, and both smiled.

..."And I would like to dedicate this song to the bride and groom, Sara and Gil, for everything they have done for me. I truly love them both, and have had such a big impact on my life. Without either of them, I dont know where I would be today. I want to wish you both the best of luck in the future!" Ecklie raised his glass, and looked to where Gil and Sara were seated. They both looked at Ecklie and said, "Thank you."

The music started playing, and Grissom stood up. He held out his hand and said, "Will you dance with me, Sara Sidle?" She grabbed his hand and said, "Lets go."

They walked to the center of the room. Everyone around them was watching like hawks. Grissom pulled Sara close, and she rested her head on his shoulder. "mmmm," Sara said. Everyone was smiling happily at the two newlyweds. A few moments later, Catherine got up and asked Warrick to dance. More and more people were beginning to pair up and dance.

"I love you Sara." Gil said. She pulled back and looked into his blue eyes. "I love you too Gil" and their lips met. Sara yet again found the spot on his shoulder for her head. "I can't believe we are this lucky." Gil said. "I know," Sara responded.

They danced in silence, and then a few more songs after that. Once the last song was over, Sara took Gil's hands and said, "Thank you for everything. I am the luckiest woman on this earth marrying you." She smiled, and he smiled back at her.

"The wedding, this reception, this whole night, has been really, really great." Gil said, pulling her into a warm hug.

Sara reached up to his ear and whispered with a huge grin on her face, "Just you wait until tonight".


End file.
